a pro choice approach to ending abortion

I don't like getting political (and I know I do too much).  This is an issue that really sets me on fire.
Abortion.

First, let's dissolve a couple myths.  Pro choice absolutely DOES NOT MEAN pro abortion.  I hate abortion, and I am spending my life fighting it by raising a daughter who will never feel the need to have one, and a son who will not leave a woman believing it is her only choice.
Abortions are primarily women who feel so desperate that they don't feel there is another choice, it's not usually the independent woman working a high paying job who could afford a baby, or at least has the insurance to have the baby and put it up for adoption.  It is primarily women who feel so desperate that they don't feel there is another choice, now, put yourself in their shoes, and think about the hurdles that would keep them from keeping their child, we'll come back to that....

We are completely backwards in our approach as a culture.
We think that making something legal or illegal will matter? No.  It starts where everything starts, with our kids.  I have the simplest, most effective way to stop abortions.  The problem? Participation.
Talk to your kids.
Talk to them when it's awkward.
We have been so caught up in the argument of what the school is allowed to teach our children about sex education, to the point that instead of teaching ways to protect themselves or ways to stay abstinent, they are learning nothing except the raw facts of sex, if that.
Here is a brief description of what my parents told me about sex: "                       . "
I'm pretty sure I had no idea how babies were really made until I was in high school and had access to google.
If we raise kids not telling them about sex, not telling them about what can happen, and ways to prevent it, keeping them informed that accidents do happen and nothing is completely reliable, then they will know what *can* happen, and how to lessen the likelihood.  As much as I would love to tell my daughter to never have sex, to wait until she's married, the numbers don't lie where abstinence is taught, teaching abstinence without the underlying lessons of how to prevent unwanted pregnancy and STDs isn't effective.  As much as, in our dream world, none of our daughters would ever give in to any of those sneaky teenaged boys with their too much axe spray and newly found driver's licenses.

Here is my plan to prevent my daughter from getting an abortion:

1. Talk to her about sex.  Talk to her about ways to prevent unwanted pregnancies and STDs, but tell her as well there are always surprises.  Things can break, you have to remember to take pills, and I've seen a lot of pregnancies with certain contraception like the ring.  Nothing is 100% but abstinence, but I'm not stupid, I know she's going to be a young lady with a world of young men, and I will tell her about all the options she has to prevent a pregnancy and keep herself well, if she chooses to have sex.  I will also tell her of the emotional ramifications of being giving herself away.
2. I will tell my daughter what I tell her every single day, and what I think parents who don't tell their children should be jailed for withholding from their babies, and that is this:  There is absolutely NOTHING ON EARTH   you can do or say to me or anyone that will lessen my love for you.  This is something I feel could prevent a lot of abortions, but something I am so sad to report not a lot of teenagers hear.  I will always tell my daughter that as long as I am living, I will always be there for her, and that with every breath in me, I will support her.  I will work at McDonald's before I will let her need for anything.  I will tell her, although I'm sure it will be awkward and I really don't want to think that my daughter will lose her innocence until she's 30 and married, is that she will not break my heart or make me upset with her if she comes to me and tells me she is pregnant.  I will not yell at her, I will not throw her out, I will not treat her like she is a huge disappointment.  At that point, it's too late to scare them out of having sex, the deed is done, and you can either shun or love, and no good comes from shunning and shaming your child.  I will love her.  Period.
3. I will let her know she can always talk to me, about anything.  I will not scream at her if she tells me she wants to go on birth control.
4. I will let her in on the age old truth: Boys lie.  Boys will do anything for sex.
5. Probably the most important, I will not let my daughter own barbies.  Or any toy that displays skimpy clothes and whore like makeup.  I want my daughter to play with toys that let her learn and grow, not teach her that she has to dress skimpy and wear a ton of makeup to be of worth.  I will not raise her to think she can do anything she wants... that a girl can do.  I want her to know she can do ANYTHING she wants.  I will not let her think she is limited to the professions of the barbies on the shelves, or of the pink lego boxes (magician, baker, pet groomer).  I let her play with cars, and she loves them as much as she loves her dolls.  I will not teach her that she has to take care of her husband, I am trying my hardest to show her through my husband and myself that marriage is a partnership between two equals, she is not lesser.  I am teaching her she is loved and important and SMART.  The hardest thing to teach my beautiful daughter is that her beauty does not define her, it is not her worth.  Her worth comes from her kindness, her brilliance, her amazing attitude (yes my daughter is a toddler, and yes, her attitude is amazing).  The hardest part of giving my daughter a great self image will be battling what magazines and television are trying daily to tell her.  I will fight the messages of, "you aren't pretty enough, you need this makeup to be beautiful, you cannot be loved if you are overweight, you are worthless if you don't primp and prime yourself," from everywhere.
6. I will teach her that if a boy is pressuring her, he must know he doesn't have a long term shot with her, and he isn't worth it.  If a boy doesn't want to wait, he's not worth it.  She is worth waiting for, she is worth working for, she is worth being polite for.  She is worth so much more than the television is trying to tell her.

Here is my plan to prevent my son from making a girl want an abortion:

1. I will make sure he knows that prevention is HIS responsibility too.
2. I will also tell him I love him so much, and nothing he does will make me love him less, and that he can bring anything to me and I won't kill him.
3. I will make sure he's stocked if he needs prevention, I will tell him I hope he waits, but I am not dumb enough to think that my teenage son will listen to me all the time.  His body is sending him messages so loud he won't be able to hear me over them.  
4. I will make sure he understands that if he gets a girl pregnant, he is not off the hook.  It is his responsibility to support the girl in whatever she chooses, if she wants to raise the baby, I will offer the family refuge in my home, I will offer support, if the mother chooses adoption, I will support him emotionally and I will encourage him to support her emotionally too.  If he wants to keep his baby and the mother does not, I will offer to keep the baby in our home and give any help that they need.

Ending abortion does not lie in the hands of legislators, it will happen whether it is legal or illegal if we continue on the path we are going as a nation.  We have to start at home, start with our sons and daughters, and let them know that we are there for them if they mess up, if they fall, we will help them.  I would venture to say the vast majority of abortions would end if we practiced these principles.